Mother’s Day 2018 – Dear Mom

Dear Mom,

Every time a day goes by that has significant meaning to the both of us I can’t help but get a little emotional. The days leading up to it are pretty hard to not think about you more than usual.

Christmas.
Your birthday.
The day you passed.
Mother’s Day.

Whenever these days come around I can’t help but reminisce. What I remember most are the Mother’s Days from when I was really young. The year the family attended a Mother’s Day brunch at one of those fancy restaurants and had to dress all fancy, all the years we had family parties and potlucks where we would just sit around, eat, and talk all day, and all those gifts I got you while growing up. You saved everything. I found all the letters, the drawings, the craft projects while I was cleaning out your things. ❤️ I actually saved some of the ones I couldn’t part with.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mommy! I know it’s a little early but I’ll be working on Sunday and don’t want to forget how I’m feeling or what I’m thinking at this moment. I think that with each holiday that passes it doesn’t really get easier, but I get a little better at dealing with it. I miss you more and more with each passing day. I always think about buying you a candle as a gift since I know that was what you always looked forward to getting from me. You and candles lol. Now I’m obsessed too!

Wow, I’m really turning into my mother. I guess that’s not really a bad thing. You were a beautiful person.

Love you,

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Without My Mom – Year 2

I’m taking a break from my regularly scheduled programming to remember my mom today. I can’t believe it’s been 2 years since she left us, it feels like just yesterday.

I don’t know why it’s so difficult for me to accept, I know they say that time heals but I disagree. I feel just as devastated today as the day she passed. I relive her last weeks in hospice, what it was like for my family, how many people came to see her. I relive her last day and the morning that it happened quite often, that image of her and everyone around me that is engrained in my mind forever. I relive the moments after she passed. I cried like I never have before, unabashedly, like no one was there.

I cried into every person’s arms that hugged me. As I write this, I’ll admit that tears still roll down my face. I just miss her so much. There are the days where I celebrate her and then there are the days I mourn. Today is a combination of the 2.

I was 7 in this picture – from then until I was 30 I believed my mom was invincible. She was my Super Woman. Yes, we didn’t agree on a lot of things but we also agreed on a lot of other things. As I grew older a lot of people told me that I remind them of my mom. I never saw it, until now. There are lots of people that miss my mom and when they see me they say I’m just like her. I take that as a compliment. 🙂

I miss you, Mommy! Here on Earth or up in Heaven you’re still my Super Woman. 

xoxo,

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Happy Belated Birthday Mom

Dear Mommy,

Happy belated birthday! I’m a couple days late but I know that you have been with me lately. It’s as if I can feel your presence around me, it almost gives me butterflies constantly.

We had a Preview Day on Sunday for Ninong’s! We wanted it to be our Grand Opening, but we still have things to do before everything at the new place is just right. The dream I had of you in our new location keeps replaying in my mind. You were sitting at a table, sitting up straight and looking around with a smile. I hope you approve and we make you proud when we officially open here. I’m doing my best, and though some times that may not be good enough I hope I am some how able to do you justice. Make you proud. I know you would’ve handled this with more poise and grace than I ever could.

After the Preview Day we had a friends and family dinner at the new place, the night before your birthday. It was more of a birthday party for you, you would have been 67 years old. We all miss you so much. I can’t believe that exactly 3 weeks after your day of birth we will be remembering you on the day that you passed. 

Happy birthday Mom! I love you and miss you every day, I wish you were here but I know that you’re with the Lord smiling from Heaven.

xoxo,

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