It’s been a long while since I’ve written to you (actually, it’s been a while since I’ve written on this blog at all). This year, your absence has hit me right where it hurts. Charlie, Carlo, and I had a long conversation about you last weekend. You just came up in conversation randomly. I told them about my dreams of you, we reminisced about memories of you, and we talked about how you changed our lives forever. I actually admitted that though I have many vivid memories of our times together that your face is beginning to fade in my mind. And it made me sad to think that was possible. Though I cling on to our laughs, cries, happiness, and sad moments as tightly as I can the image of your face isn’t as clear as it used to be. But your loving spirit is as clear as day.
Today, I see your face all over Facebook and Instagram and remember how handsome you are. How could I ever forget that face?! I remember how hard it was to get you to smile that signature smile of yours because you always wanted to make a funny face to the camera. Look at that smile! It lights up a room!
And I love how most of your friends and family picked those silly photos of you. The funny faces show your true character, the guy we love so much.
I reminds me that a lot of us aren’t as afraid of being so silly thanks to you. You accepted all of us and loved us for who we truly are. Even with faults and short comings, you loved us unconditionally. Thank you for that, especially when we needed it the most.
I love and miss you Ray. More than words can ever express. As life milestones pass us by I can’t help but wish you were here to see them happen. But I always forget that you are with us, you’re with all of us.
The only thing I can think of saying now is the last words I said to you, “I love you, I love you, I love you.”